Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
