She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
