I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize