was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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