Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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