Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize