so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
