my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
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All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize