If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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