I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I touched a dick in church today
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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