I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
