Quick, to the slutcave!
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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