but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
