the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize