hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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