how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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