y did u give ur computer a hand job?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
There are leaves in my underwear?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
