Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
