Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize