Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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