I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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