I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
