Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
