remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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