apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
