i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
