So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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