will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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