I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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