Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
