I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize