Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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