I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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