We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
