she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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