he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Randomize