All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
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