You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
that may or may not have been my penis.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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