Life is so much better after having sex.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
