I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
