I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Even my vagina gasped.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
