I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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