I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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