just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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