i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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