yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
