I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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