So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
