how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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