Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
